Hi Graham,
yes I remember Vitruvius referring to the femininity of columns. I think he notes the origins of the corinthian columns as being styles of the flowers growing from the grave of a girl. I don't remember the exact details but they will be easily available.
Hathor, of course, was actually often represented as a column capital in Egypt and across the Levant, but then so was Bes I think.
So while there was a common association between the female form and good architecture, and in particular with columns, it was not universally the case I wouldn't say.
Another good example is the porch that is part of the Erechtheon on the Acropolis of Athens, and which is known as the Caryatids of course has these women actually forming the supporting pillars, for historical reasons.
I am working on studying the ideology of this sort or ornamentation at the moment.
Dave Light