Sitamun lost out to her half- brother Amenhotep III. She was denied something vital to the continuation of her lineage. Her family went from mothers of gods to tolerated nobles to disesteemed heretics over the course of several dynasties. Im suggesting here that the clan mother affiliations of Tiye and Iaret stem from earlier dynasties. They survived the Hyksos intrusion because they were southerners. There were other lineages as well and Im not suggesting all or even most were matrilinear. Only certain tribal clans follow that tradition but these are the old ways for the reasons I outlined earlier. Eg Men that war and hunt and protect the territory often don't come home. Just as the lioness owns her caverns for generations, working in cooperation with other lionesses, the sepat heiress for lack of a better term, the female descendants of certain lineages, they hold their territories.
They belong to and are only passed down from woman to woman. Marriage into these tribal clans is next to impossible. It always has been. Diplomatic marriages are the exception not the rule by and large. Most of the time the new husband turned out to be an entitled bastard- soaking up resources like a greek sponge. They didn't often work out well for the less powerful families- those families isolated by their relative old age- their status and class amongst the other families. The oldest families with the most land tend to live the furthest away from the big towns. An oasis or rural valley is a means by which a people can remain somewhat autonomous.
As Amenhotep III's mother Mutemwiya hailed from Kurdistan, Amenhotep III had no clan mother lands. He claimed his father was a god that lay with a mortal queen. His remainders named him the father of the gods subsequent to his death. Amenhotep was for all intensive purposes a kid when his father succumbed. His mother had no local roots to bolster Amenhotep's ascension. He needed a scepter more than a throne. He needed a dowry basically to placate the clergy of Amen. They were the king makers after all.
Tiye hailed from an old Matrilinear clan indigenous to East Africa. Her clan mother territories extended from Oryx to Wawat. She wasn't born there and neither was her mother or grandmother even. They were however the descendants of an important ethnic lineage of women who intermarried with a generation of Egyptian nobles and kings. THe macro lineage probably consisted of five to ten families of Wawat monarchs and nobles, tribal chiefs, intellects, goldmsmiths, sculptors etc. These individuals intermarried with Upper and Lower Egyptian nobles. Their respective families traded together- rather like the concept of sister cities on different continents. The Wawat had their Wawat towns throughout Egypt -the Egyptians had their Egypt towns throughout Wawat and futher south.
Perhaps the the families partnered with another while within the Kap- they were all vassal children of the kap. The vassal children -Yey, Mutemwiya, Amenhotep III, Yuya, Tuja, Aye etc, descended from lineages that held the same respective stations and status over the previous generations within the kap. These alliances- these pairs over the generations were accruing more stability and more power unto themselves with each passing generation.
Tiye's clan mother came to Egypt in the 12th Dynasty. She may not have been "royal" but the Heiress was dense as ivory. Worth her weight in deben gold. The same daughter or relative- some female representative from one of any number of important female lines of the same specific vassal state within Wawat Territory -Lower Sudan to the Horn - a small ruling elite- one daughter of another of one of a very few lineages became the wives of masters of the horse. The masters of the horse were of Indo-Aryan descent these were the remnants of Hyksos, Mittanian, Levantine, Minoan and even Libyan patrilineal families. The stewards of Min as it were, the descendants of vassal princes enslaved by one Thutmose III or Amenhotep II. Some are of much earlier generations -present since Hyksos times. This tiny population of 'others' represent something pivotal within the kap- as do the vassal princes like Maipepri or a few the female founders of the 12th dynasty.
The ceremonial marriages of two high ranking children of the kap symbolized all that the per aa -what was under the governmental bodies control. The children of the harem are the servants of the king. Their diplomatic marriages were likely completely arranged.
Two or three - countless competing female lines with just two respective contracts forged at the onset of the 18th dynasty- each is entitled to the throne of Astet. But which assumed the scepter?
The king is not all he's made up to be. With so many people afoot, the physical manifestation of ones population represented a whole lot.
Sitamun represented that which was unattainable. There is this idea that somehow being associated with your rival made you better. I don't think she was very keen on being the king's sister. It just may be that she chose to not claim Amenhotep III as her brother and only begrudgingly acknowledge his kingship. She did not HAVE to acknowledge Amenhotep outside of dictates of etiquette and honour. What do you think poor Huy named Hapu thought of all this?
Amenhotep left more evidence of his existence than any one else's. I find it compelling that Sitamun's presence is felt in the tomb of the Mistress of the Harem -Tuya herself. Sitamun represented something near and dear to the couple entombed. They were stewards of the Kap. They were stewards of the children of gods. Mortal Kings die badly. Immortal Kings never die at all.
May She Live is uttered after an heiress's name. She needs all the powerful reaffirmation the world can resolve.