Horemheb's stela was also written long after the event and intended to write the Amarna incident out of history - and that included both Aye and Ankhes.
I don't really see the import of that. Everybody's been rewriting Amarna history for 3500 years starting with the big Kahuna himself Akhenaten. So just exactly are we supposed to do then? Discard everything written 5,10,15 20 years after the fact? If that's the case everything ever written will vanish.
I repeat; why in god's name would Ankhes prefer the son of an enemy monarch to her own grandfather who she's known and trusted all her life as a co-ruler?
To start with where's the undisputed evidence that Ay was Ankh's grandfather? There isn't any that I know of.
Next why does she prefer a Hittite to an Egyptian? Well She spells it out specifically in the deeds; She was apparently being forced to marry a commoner something that was anaethma to her. This rather proves that Ay was not her grandfather or any relative whatsoever otherwise he would have been an acceptable candidate. But let's just say that it isn't Ay and he is her grandfather and grandpa and they corruled and lived happily ever after or at least until he croaked two to three three years later leaving her, once again, alone. Then what happens? Well this leaves only Horemhab who everybody absolutely agrees was a commoner who made it from the bottom of the dung hill to the pharaoh's palace in an almost uninterupted ascent. He made it crystal clear that he's going to be pharaoh. So everything is still intact. Clearly there are no royal sons or nephews or collateral lines left to draw on. She is is faced with marrying the commoner HOremhab, she clearly despises, or throws the dice and try's to overthrow him. So she's sends a letter to Supp. who sends Zannanza who gets killed. Nothing's changed.
Why is the queen not given a name? the Hittite royal house was on correspondence terms with the Pharoah's and their consorts.
Irrelevant. Try reading the Amarna letters sometime. Here I'll save you the trouble. Which King is this one written to Amen III, Akh., Smenkhare, or Tut? (I picked this at random btw) "Rib Hadda to his lord king of all countries, great king, king of battle may the lady of gubla grant power to the king my lord I fall at the feet of my lord, my sun, 7 times and 7 times. May the king, the lord, know gubla the loyal maidservant of the king is safe and sound. The king however has withdrawn his support of his loyal city..." See what I mean? But how about when the pharaoh sends a letter to one of his subjects. Well it doesn't get any better look at this one. "Say to Aziru ruler of Amurru; Thus the king your lord saying...,." Who wrote this letter? Remember there are no dates on these letters. So once again its AmenIII, Akh, Smenk, or tut.
They could scarcely have helped knowing the lady's name and the name of her husband but neither is mentioned.
On the contrary Tut's name is mentioned in the Deeds (or the HIttite equivalent of his name.)
along with Ankhs (again in Hitite). Though again there's a lot of the patent pending Brilliant Speculation about what the names "really" mean.
Perhaps because that would have made the story to easy to check?
And who in the world would check it out? And what would they do with it if they did check it out and found it wanting. Assasination was an absolutely acceptable part of ruling. There were no courts of law, no impeachment proceedings. If somebody challenged the rulers right to rule he would have had a knife in his back before he left the court. In addition to that everybody that was involved with the plot was dead. Hatti and Egypt were over a thousand miles apart. There were no telephones, planes, ships, internet or anything. It might come as a shock but they were writing history for themselves not for us.
